Two Hearts, One Flesh preview


So much of our discontentment and lack of joy or peace comes from our expectations in relationships. When looking deep into the reality of conflict in our marriages, we must be honest with ourselves about where the conflict stems from concerning both the husband and the wife.

A wise lady once told me “major on the majors and minor on the minors”. (You can see more on that HERE). She meant: don’t be consumed by the little details, inconveniences, and frustrations of everyday misunderstanding and miscommunication. That is a downward spiral into bitterness, anger, and resentment. Be forthright with the major conversations that need to take place and follow your husband in all areas. We’ll talk more about submission in another place of our study. She also told me that apathy is bitterness matured. Ouch! Are you feeling a little apathetic about an area of contention and therefor remaining stagnant in the conflict?

Forgiveness is not a feeling, but a secret choice of the heart. -“Calm My Anxious Heart”

When you’re wrestling with decisions about what the majors are and what the minors are, broaden your picture and bring a healthy perspective from Scripture.

Jesus gave His primary reason for coming to earth in Matthew 20:28 when He said He came not to be served, but to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many.-“Calm My Anxious Heart”  He asks us to enter our sphere of existence every day with the same motive. We must ask Him to practice Psalm 139:25 on us daily.

23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

This is especially true in our marriage relationship as it is the closest, most personal relationship we have on this earth.

Are you ministering to your husband? Or are you manipulating him? – “The Marriage Builder” Larry Crabb

Check the area of contention as see if there are ways, in your own spirit, you can respond (instead of reacting) to minister in the moment.

It’s a narrow road. But Scripture is clear about our roles in marriage. We will discuss those roles in one week of our study.

email me at for questions about our study.

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